When Fathers Struggle, Families Feel It

When family members and/or healthcare professionals consider who, in a family that is expecting a new baby, might develop mental health challenges in the months before and after a baby's arrival, they often focus on mothers and their risk for experiencing postpartum depression. While healthcare professionals understand that maternal health is critically important, they are increasingly aware that paternal mental health matters too. Research shows that about 1 in 10 fathers experience depression or anxiety during pregnancy or the first year after the birth of their child (Maternal Mental Health Leadership Alliance, 2024).

Why does paternal mental health matter? The answer is clear: a father's mental health impacts more than just him; it can affect his partner, his baby, other family members, and the entire family dynamic.

How Paternal Mental Health Can Affect Children

A recent large-scale review found that paternal depression, anxiety, and stress are linked with children’s social-emotional, language, and cognitive development, and the effects extend beyond infancy into childhood (Le Bas et al., 2025). In other words, when fathers experience mental distress, the effects of their anguish often extend beyond themselves. Children may feel the distress too, and these negative feelings can impact how they learn, connect with peers, regulate their emotions, and perform in school.

The encouraging fact is that these outcomes are not fixed. Paternal distress can be modified or changed through the use of resources and professional guidance. Addressing paternal mental health concerns is vital because a parent's emotional well-being can impact his or her child's security and development. So, supporting dads' mental health has the potential to strengthen parent and child well-being.

What Distress Can Look Like in Fathers

Paternal depression and anxiety may appear differently than the "classic" symptoms often associated with maternal depression. Instead, dads might experience some of the following characteristics or symptoms:

• Irritability or frequent frustration
• Withdraw from family or social life
• Headaches, fatigue, or sleep disruptions
• Appetite changes
• Feelings of anger, guilt, or powerlessness

One father described his experience this way: "I wanted to be there as a father, but I couldn't" (Pedersen et al., 2021, p.4). That sense of falling short—wanting to show up but feeling stuck—echoes findings from other research and emphasizes that experiencing stress plays a central role in a person's mental well-being. Fathers who reported having high stress during their partner's pregnancy were more likely to experience depression and anxiety in the months following their child's birth (Wee et al., 2015). In their research, Pedersen and colleagues (2021) and Wee and colleagues (2015) highlight that stress and anxiety can fuel depression and add to the challenges dads already face as they navigate the changes and pressures of early parenthood.

Why This Matters for Families

When fathers struggle, the ripple effects from their challenges can impact everyone. Partners may feel added strain if support is missing; children may sense withdrawal or tension at home, which can cause anxiety in them; and dads, themselves, may feel isolated, especially if there is minimal conversation or thought around their mental health.

Dhillon and colleagues (2022) describe paternal depression as a "silent pandemic" that is common, harmful, yet often overlooked.

Breaking the Silence: What Can Help?

1. Normalize and Screen – Just like mothers, fathers should be screened for depression and anxiety during their partner's pregnancy and postpartum checkups. Talking openly with a healthcare provider about mood, stress, or other mental health concerns can be a starting point for finding support (Maternal Mental Health Leadership Alliance, 2024).
2. Community and Peer Support – Experiencing feelings of isolation can exacerbate a person's distress. Groups like the Sad Dads Club provide free, peer-to-peer support through virtual and in-person meetings. Postpartum Support International offers online support groups specifically for fathers, and The Fatherhood Project at Massachusetts General Hospital provides education and programs to help fathers strengthen their mental health and family engagement. Additionally, Mental Health America offers a growing set of resources that focus on paternal mental health. These communities can help fathers feel less isolated and remind them that reaching out is a sign of strength, not weakness.
3. Father-Specific Programs – Programs tailored for dads can help fathers engage confidently in their parenting role while also caring for themselves. For example, Thrive's Father Forward: Present. Engaged. Supportive. The module provides practical strategies that dads, coparents, and caregivers can use. This module highlights the importance of fathers' involvement in child development and emphasizes the importance of self-care.
4. Partner and Family Awareness - Moms, partners, and extended family members can be important sources of support. Sometimes, dads do not recognize their own symptoms or may feel stigma in naming them. Engaging in gentle encouragement and open conversations and sharing responsibilities at home can help reduce the burden of stress and isolation and may make seeking help easier for fathers (Pedersen et al., 2021).

What Families Can Remember

The research is clear: paternal mental distress is real, it matters, and it should be addressed. Breaking the silence and connecting fathers with resources are important steps toward creating stronger, more resilient families. Supporting fathers' mental health isn't just about helping dad feel better—it's about creating a stronger family environment where everyone can thrive.

References

Dhillon, H. S., Sasidharan, S., Dhillon, G. K., & Babitha, M. (2022). Paternal depression: "The silent pandemic." Industrial Psychiatry Journal, 31(2), 350. 

Le Bas, G., Aarsman, S. R., Rogers, A., Macdonald, J. A., Misuraca, G., Khor, S., Spry, E. A., Rossen, L., Weller, E., Mansour, K., Youseff, G., Olsson, C. A., Teague, S. J., & Hutchinson, D. (2025). Paternal perinatal depression, anxiety, and stress and child development: A systematic review and meta-analysis. JAMA Pediatrics, 179(8), 903–917. 

Maternal Mental Health Leadership Alliance. (2024, November 19). Supporting new fathers: An overview of paternal mental health statistics, insights, and resources. 

Pedersen, S. C., Maindal, H. T., & Ryom, K. (2021). "I wanted to be there as a father, but I couldn't": A qualitative study of fathers' experiences of postpartum depression and their help-seeking behavior. American Journal of Men's Health.

Wee, K. Y., Skouteris, H., Richardson, B., McPhie, S., & Hill, B. (2015). The inter-relationship between depressive, anxiety, and stress symptoms in fathers during the antenatal period. Journal of Reproductive and Infant Psychology, 33(4), 359–373. 

Source

Wolbert, E. D., Rudy, T. L., & Perkins, D. F. (2025, August 28). When fathers struggle, families feel it.  Republished with permission from the Clearinghouse for Military Family Readiness.